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Monday, February 23, 2009

The Vampire Diaries Part 1: Thicker than Water

Phil Messerer is a freakin genius! The Vampire Diaries Part 1: Thicker than water is going to have you glued to the screen and if you aren’t, then you have something severely wrong with you. This film is a burst of fresh air and even though it’s about vampires the storyline is amazing and quite different than what you are used to. I give this film a full five slashes because yes, it’s that damn good.

This dark horror comedy has the gothed out Lara who despises her prissy twin sisters ways and sometimes wishes she would just fall from the planet and be done with already. Lara has a shrine of Anne Rice in her closet where she does a spell against her sister. Well soon after her sister Helen suffers a massive nose bleed that caused so much blood loss she lies in bed pale and frail as the doctor tells her mother she just needs some rest and she’ll be fine.

It’s great how the family is so dysfunctional that they all decide to help Helen stay alive by supplying her victims since she has a rare blood disease that makes her ache for that hot gush of metallic liquid to flow from her fangs down her throat. I actually can’t even dredge up one negative comment because that is just how much I liked it. I have been shouting from my rooftop that everyone needs to grab this.

I can not wait for the next installment of this series. I am addicted after seeing such madness take place in a household. As a mother what would you do when your beautiful perfect daughter becomes a monster? Do you just kill her and be done with it? Or would you figure out a way to keep her well fed and try to keep this bloody secret under wraps?

Helen’s brother Raymond is a very intelligent student of science who keeps a stack of gay porn under his bed that he thinks no one knows about. He morphs from a geeky Bill Ny the science guy type into a confident man eating shark who has no qualms about feeding his sister. I am almost positive that you will be hearing much more about this exciting film. Screw Twilight, The Vampire Diaries deserves to be reckoned with!

5 outta 5 slashes!

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