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Thursday, June 30, 2011

Trilogy of Blood

Directed by- Charlie Ruckus and Rick Kelley
27 Minutes
Release Date 2011
I posted as my facebook status last night that I was getting ready to do my review of the horror flick Trilogy of Blood and a fellow reviewer said it was so bad he decided not to even review it. So I think to myself what the hell is wrong with me since I kinda enjoyed the crazy 62 dollar budget of a horror film?
So here we have Marilyn (Brenna Lee Roth), Connie, and Sherry who are all taking a little road trip and do the one thing everyone always warns you never to do and that's pick up a damn hitch hiker. Sherry is pissed and doesn't want the freak in her car so she tells them if he touches her she kicking their asses! She says it a couple times and cracks me up- I really liked her character .
They are invited by their passenger to a barn dance that will be a total blast with plenty of food and beer. Marilyn convinces the girls to stop and get a bite and a brewsky and it soon turns out the free food might just be them. I guess Connie and Marilyn were in the mood to flirt with the boys and it turns out to be a bad move.
Once they get started the blood continuously flows and cannibals munch up on all the new meat! The film was totally thought up by the DEAD NEKS founder/singer Joey "Fangface" Broy a few years back and it looks like it all fell into place nicely. Word on the street is there's another one on the way....

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Bloodlust Zombies

80 Minutes
Release Date: 7/5/2011
Directed by: Dan Lantz
Bloodlust Zombies is one of the funniest zombie flicks I've seen in awhile, I was actually disappointed when it was over. Adult film star Alexis Texas who has been in such movie as Swap Meat, Ass Trap, Pornstar Work Out and Self Service stars. She is cute as hell and eventually one zombie slashing bitch! 
Zlantoff Industries have been developing a formula designed for the purpose of having the military's enemies turn into raving maniacs who will rip each other apart. A false alarm has the compound on lock down and no one can leave till the situation it cleared. Then a lab cat turns the situation around and soon members of the plant are raging zombies.

I absolutely adored the character Darren, he cracked my ass up! He was witty and always had something to say. The head of the project Judy was an older woman whose husband was killed in the military so this virus is her baby. The old coot that owns the whole plant is Bobby lee and Andrea is his trusty "suck"retary.

I was just looking up a character's name since I lost my notes and read a very unflattering review for the film. Don't listen to it- take a chance and check it out. Yes it's low budget, campy, and little drawn out at times but over all it's a pretty damn cool zombie flick! It's corny as hell and that's what makes it a smash!

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Strangers Online

Not rated
106 Minutes
The sexy voiced Hollis Parker is the host of a radio/web nightly program called Strangers Online that certainly proves that the freaks definitely come out at night.These strangers come in all shapes. races and with some weird ass fetishes. It's like the Jerry Springer circus of the night time world. 
A cute blond named Karen is hired as the new intern for the station and it seems she harbors a crush on the Latin host and starts with sneaking glances until finally getting him to her place where of course she gets into his pants. He immediately wishes it never happened and goes home to scrub himself raw with regret.

Karen does not care in the least that Hollis is seriously involved with a woman and will do whatever it takes to get her man. Then there's the weird peeping tom neighbor Zeke, could he be a threat to the couple as well? Everyone seems to think Hollis murdered his ex-wife and people even come on his show re-enacting the death.
Strangers Online does keep you guessing and leaves you interested in the plot. The acting goes smooth and the two main characters have awesome chemistry so there's no stiff awkward sex scenes to endure- it's all smooth sailing. Now as sex talk host Hollis' life run's reckless will he ever be able repair it and just move on?

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Wisconsin Project X

OK, Wisconsin Project X was unbelievably cool and I recommend it to anyone who likes/ loves zombies! The film takes place in the very small town of Wisconsinville, Montana when a scientist named Dr. Winston is feverishly working on a new experiment that of course goes horribly wrong.
Dumb ass was trying to develop a new type of preservative for the booming snack cake industry and accidentally creates this artificial living organism that turns people into humanoids so now the town is crawling with them. The few smart ones band together and get ready for a bloody showdown.
The thing I like the best was the little differences like the special effects for instance they were fucking cool as hell and I enjoyed the simplicity of it all. It totally works for the film and just might have you saying that was pretty damn cool! I couldn't tell you the technicalities of it all since I know nothing about that department!
You just have to take a peek, I mean if you end up not liking it all you gotta do is shut the darn TV off. Seriously if you like the zombies, this film will have you whooping it up while inspiring you to make you own horror flick. Budgets are tight at times but creativity seems to overflow in this one.

Monday, June 6, 2011

Anniversary at Shallow Creek

89 minutes
Directed by- Jon D. Wagner
Anniversary at Shallow Creek slams into you like a runaway freight train from about 2 minutes in till the very end. Sam and Page are a young couple very much in love who decide to take a little vacation to relax and forget about grueling medical school for awhile. Four of their very close friends join them for some fun.
Unbeknown-st to them the previous year the house they are now staying in was the scene of a  double murder and of course the killer was never caught. Now this killer is a sharp shooting son of a bitch who enjoys using his sniper rifle. Soon the bodies start falling and the killer doesn't stop at the gun, knives will slice as well.
It's great to watch a film that has you go "Damn!" within the first five minutes. Now while their trying to chill and enjoy each others company a young boy knocks on the door stating that his parents are out- can he stay with them? I would of said you better go find another stinkin babysitter brat!   
I will admit I would of liked it a lot better if they didn't add one particular element but I can't tell or it will ruin the film for you. Let's just say that sometime's a single answer is better than a dual one. The film is totally worth viewing with a few unexpected jumps that give you heart a little boost.