Goatsucker

I know I am a lover of all things scary. Whether it be movies, hayrides or local urban legend or myths…I am loving it! I live in New Jersey and we have so much going on in the local urban legends category that they came out with a whole franchise for it titled Weird NJ.

Well I watched the movie Goatsucker recently and it was about a legend that started in medieval Europe and over time this creature was being spotted everywhere.Well since this legend was supposed to be around the area Mr. Walters figured “hey, I could make some serious cash on this” and decided to add a hiking tour titled the Goatsucker at his Hidden Valley Hiking Tours.

It ends up being a popular hike and people started flocking to get a chance to possibly see anything related to the Goatsucker. Thing is hikers started to go missing, large animals were being found mutilated and some hair that was tested and found to be of a unknown origin.

The last group for the day waits in a room for their tour guide named Margret. The driver comes and piles the people in the back of the truck for the 35 minute ride out to the trail. Their guide still doesn’t show up and is now considered missing.

Luckily for them a guide named Heidi just so happens to be up there on her day off and Mr. Walters forces her to take on them on the tour. Rhonda who is a totally ditzy blond gets changed into the proper attire and they’re off!

Alan is pissed because he came to the tour to get away from Rhonda who won’t get that she was just a fling for him and he doesn’t want her. Pam is an older lady that paws Alan hoping to get a piece of the boy toy while Eugene is just plain nerdy and weird.

Wayne the older man is constantly pulling a flask from his pocket and sneaking swigs. Soon the blood is flying and the Goatsucker is on the hunt. Could this thing be feeling too much at home in these woods? Maybe it even has a friend that protects it?

But how could a beast befriend anyone? Goatsucker was a little independent flick with lot’s of big twists. Even though you didn’t see much of the creature it was still effective enough for you to envision it as it ripped into it’s victims with glee

Southern Fried Bigfoot

Living in NJ, I know what it is like to have a legendary monster slinking around in the woods since The Jersey Devil has been spotted for decades. So many people have turned in accounts of seeing it but there is no actual proof. Well in Southern Fried Bigfoot you learn all about the hairy beast who has been dwelling down south since the first report back in 1837.

Does this creature actually exist or is it some elaborate hoax that has been continued for years? Countess reports have documented the monster, while huge footprints have been found and cast to study. Most of the casts have 3,4, or five toes which they seem to believe it is from the inbreeding within the Bigfoot breed. Science claims this whole deal as bullshit since there is no concrete evidence to support the claims of this swamp devil.

Bigfoot has been called many names such as yeti, sasquatch, cattle critter, mo mo, raggedy man, swamp devil, wild man, skunk ape, booger, and even the last caveman. He wasn’t given the name of Bigfoot until the 50’s and there were 1000’s of reports of people seeing this thing. Cattle was attacked which led them to believe that it’s a scary aggressive primate who is actually attracted to trailer parks.

Bigfoot is described as being well over 7ft tall with arms so long that when they hang down they go past his knees. Claims have said that sometimes it’s hairy body is silver, white or dark colored in nature. This documentary was a blast to watch and kinda makes you go “Hmmm could there really be Bigfoot somewhere out there?” Who knows, science doesn’t have an answer for everything out there so why couldn’t there be a Bigfoot out there lurking?

4 outta 5 slashes